It's a Girl ...

With tremendous joy and anticipation we are proud to announce the arrival of the newest member of our family...

Life after death...

It's been a while...is anybody still there?

On the topic of life after death there is so much that I can write about the subject, and will, just not today.

Today I want to share with you about a new life after Lucy's death, a life that we still can't believe is happening.  On March 12, what would have been Lucy's 7th birthday, we were gifted a surprise present from Heaven, the news of a new baby!

Surprised? So were we!

It's true for those of you who may have heard the news but have not seen us, or have seen us but were too polite to say anything:).  I am pregnant and we are thrilled to be expecting a new baby, and might I add very soon!  Baby Marlett is expected to make his or her debut sometime in the middle of November.

Finding out we're pregnant one year after loosing our baby girl to a devastating disease, and on her birthday nonetheless, it's nearly impossible to describe the emotions that accompany arguably two of life's greatest changes - life and death.  To simultaneously grieve the loss of Lucy and be joyful for the new life growing and wiggling inside me is indescribable.

We have run the full gamut of emotions, from questioning God yet again for choosing us for this journey, to praising and thanking Him for entrusting us with a new life.  All of the emotions that new expecting parents experience, we are feeling them, in addition to all of the emotions that parents who have experienced the death of a child feel.  Lucy's life and death has forever changed us!

How do the kids feel about the new baby?  They are over the moon thrilled to have a new baby brother or sister in their life.   We believe that Lucy is too.   The kids each believe that Lucy sat with God and picked just the right baby to join our family.

For those of you who are wondering, this has not been an easy pregnancy.   I'm not in my twenties or thirties anymore, but I won't complain, to you anyway :).  Our family of six, God willing, will soon be a family of seven.  We are preparing for yet another huge life change in our house!

Hope...

Today is the reason we have hope...

the reason that we know we will be together again, forever!

Happy Easter

Today it's her birthday...

Today, she would have been seven.  As hard as I try, I can't even imagine what she would be like as a seven-year-old.  I believe this is partly because we lived in the moment with her, fearful of what the future held.  We became experts at living in the present, focusing on what we had right in front of us, loving her for who she was, and not what she could become.  We are so grateful that we were able to have that focus, it was a survival tool.  I suppose this is one of the many transformations that happened to us as her parents, parents to a special needs child, a medically fragile child.

It's difficult to know just how exactly to celebrate her birthday, her death anniversary, Mother's Day, Christmas, the Fourth of July....or really, any holiday without her.  Hallmark hasn't cornered the market on this yet.  Last year we did a toy drive for the hospital in her honor to celebrate her birthday.  This year I just don't have the energy or the emotional capacity to coordinate anything of that magnitude.  You can donate to her research fund at the UMDF.

There will be cake, however! She wouldn't want it any other way.  But the cake has to be, "only a'nilla!" Translation, only vanilla!  For someone who never ate cake, she sure was firm on the flavor she wanted.   There will also be balloons, a doc McStuffins balloon at that, she loved balloons.  Last year the kids did a balloon release, sending their birthday messages to Heaven (Please don't leave a comment about the environmental impact this has on the world. Trust me when I say there are far fewer balloons released since Lucy died than when she was alive :).

When I think of her birthday, I think of each and every year we celebrated her life.  I am so thankful that God gifted us such a special, amazing, extraordinary little girl.  To us, her time here on this earth will always feel too short.

Happy 7th Birthday Lucy Grace!

Remembering...

Today has to go down as one of the hardest days since Lucy died. Like Lucy, we felt surrounded in love.  Thank you for all of your thoughts and prayers.  We could never do this alone. 

I wanted to re post this video, we watched it over and over again today both laughing and crying.  We are so very grateful for the memories!

Password:Lucy

One year...

Three hundred sixty-five days, 8,760 hours, 525,949 minutes ago our lives forever changed!  It seems impossible to us that it has been this long since we last held our sweet sweet girl, and yet we know that when compared with eternity this life is short!

 Today, like everyday, we will celebrate and remember the extraordinary life of our little girl, 

Lucy Grace Marlett. 

March 12, 2008 - February 8, 2014

You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.  

Psalm 16:11